I've had this conversation with two three/four year old boys-- one, a child whom I nannied since he was 2, and the other with my nephew. I'm sure the question is asked of many caretakers, by children figuring out what to call theirs and others' body parts. It's a process for each family, largely depending on how comfortable the parental figures are with discussing unexposed body parts. The exposed ones, however, are an integral part of 'the baby show' (things parents make their children perform to demonstrate their growth). It's true - parents are obsessed with watching their children point to their own body parts:
"Where are (baby)'s eyes?"
[baby points to eyes]
*eruption of awe/pride/enthusiasm/encouragement/applause*
Certainly, as a nanny and as a sister, I have little access to how this manifests itself in more intimate situations when parental figures discuss the unexposed body parts. Some children have more exposure to their parents' bodies than others. Some parents feel comfortable walking around their home naked. Others' children have never seen them in their underwear. And though a parent's modesty is not always indicative of their child's ability to name body parts , I think it's safe to assume that the child will have a better reference if she's seen her family naked before. But it's around 3 or 4 when these questions come out of their mouths. Sure, for some kids it's earlier, or if you're a very open parent, the child me already be well-equipped with body part language. When I have a kid, I'm going to tell him what a vagina is and her what a penis is. And I'll tell him that I have one or that her father has one. And they'll see it, and when they point to it and name it, we'll cheer just like parents do when kids point to their noses. Because knowledge is good and all types of bodies are natural and normal.
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